Well, I had my date with Brian last night. I thought it went well, but I didn’t feel a spark with him. I think there is a possibility of friendship, but that would probably be about it.
It began when we met at my local Corner Bakery Café. He saw me standing by the front door, approached me, said hello, and that was it. No handshake, no hug, no nothing!
Once inside, I asked him if he’d ever been to this place. He said he hadn’t, but he’s been to someplace similar. I went up to the cashier, placed my order, then turned around to see if he was ready to place his. Brian was still looking up at the menu board, with his hands in his pockets. “You ready?” I asked.
“No, I’m still deciding. You get yours and I’ll meet you over there (pointing to the tables outside),” he says.
We went Dutch for dinner. Guess I shouldn’t have assumed he’d pay for dinner. Normally, that’s what a gentleman does. But, you know when you “assume”…it makes an ass out of you and me!
We decided to sit outside since the weather was nice. We talked quite a bit, and he seemed very interested in what I do for a living. We talked about our families, our backgrounds, etc. He’s very close with his adult daughters. Almost to the point where he can’t stand being away from them. He told me a number of times that his family is number one in his life.
The other thing I noticed was how he seemed a little depressed. He would smile if I said something funny, then immediately wipe his forehead and be back to his somber self. He kept putting himself down, saying that his family wasn’t very educated, which meant that he wasn’t very smart, he had fallen into the wrong crowd growing up, and that his now deceased wife was the one who “straightened” him out.
I tried to switch up the conversation. I wanted to make it light, fun, and not so serious all the time. I even made him laugh a few times. But not once did he make me laugh. For me, laughter is the ultimate attraction. I can overlook certain qualities if a man’s sense of humor is the main attraction. I sensed that Brian doesn’t have much of a playful side. If he does, I didn’t see it! He kept asking me about my job, wanting to know if I’ve met any celebrities and what are they like. I said I have, but I don’t like to talk about them. I know it’s interesting to people who aren’t in the business that I am, but until I know and trust you, I’m just not going to go there.
Other than Brian NOT making me laugh, he never gave me a sign that he was interested in me. There was NO touching or body language to show me that he was even remotely interested.
At one point, I needed to use the ladies room. When I came back, I asked if he wanted to walk around. “Sure,” he says. We stopped into a frozen yogurt shop and tasted a bunch of the flavors. I joked around and told him that the mint one tasted like my toothpaste! He laughed but didn’t come back with anything. I decided to get some toothpaste flavored (mint) fro-yo, and went to the register. He followed right after me. Again, he didn’t even offer to pay. I paid for my own.
We walked back to where the outdoor tables and chairs were, ate our frozen yogurt and talked some more. I started to get cold and figured this was a good way to end our date. Brian said that he really enjoyed meeting me, and then we walked together to the parking structure. Once there, we realized our cars were parked at opposite ends. I told him thanks for coming out to my neighborhood, and he said, “Yeah, it was really fun.” With his hands in his pockets, he turned and walked away.
No hug, no handshake, no nothing! He almost looked like he couldn’t get out of there fast enough. I’ve replayed last night in my head, and I really couldn’t tell if he was remotely attracted to me. But that’s ok, even though he was average looking, I wasn’t physically attracted to him. Sometimes, it’s ok to just be friends.
Time will tell if I ever hear from him again.